Forever..

Let’s talk about us for a minute…

                I am sure you’ve heard the saying, ‘nothing lasts forever’. The longer I’m here on this merry-go-round of life, the more I realize how true that statement is. Lately, I have been reflecting on life and my place in it; the things that seem to matter the most here in this world, are the hardest to hold onto. Children grow up, jobs come and go, friends come into your life and fade from view. What makes me “me”, seems to be harder to define with each passing day, certainly a little more with every personal and major life event. The things that used to be low on my list of importance, now occupy hours of my time, which I lose track of more and more with ease. When my wife and I were first married, we had priorities that focused on who we were, and what we enjoyed. As all of you know life happens, and in our case, a family takes form in the way of children, and in the span of what seems like moments, our priorities and our hobbies suddenly revolve around them. In most cases, that’s not a bad thing. We need to be attentive to our family and children, the time is well spent, and I never regret being with mine for fun adventures and just being a family.

          For a few minutes though, let’s talk about what happens to us personally when we don’t keep a part of ourselves focused on who we are, our passions and purpose in life. You can have your kids as a passion and certainly, they can give you purpose, but what happens to the rest of your story. In my case, I used to have a specific personal direction in my life, one that I could define and knew well; perhaps you did too, or still do. But if we lose sight of that on the inside, it can affect how we act on the outside, and certainly it can or will eventually cripple our ability to find joy with our family and others because we have lost ourselves in the drive to fulfill the passions and purposes of everyone but who you are on the inside.

Here is one thought that I commonly find in my random personal fear file, ‘how will I ever live in this house without kids running around in it?’ Even with a wonderful wife in my life, whom I feel closer to every day, I fear loneliness. It’s like a hungry animal waiting for its next meal, and I’m their prey. I try to hide from it, but I’m terrified of being exposed, I run from one comfort replacing idea to the next. No amount of “things” can bring me peace. However, looking back to when my dad was alive, I realize that he was my ‘peacemaker’. I always felt safe around him. I suppose him being gone now, leaves me feeling more revealed than I imagined possible, more unsure of how to process happiness. He was indeed my hero and mentor; now the question is, how do I pass that on? Sometimes we think of how things could have been in our lives, instead of how they really are. One thing my dad said to me time and time again, “be happy with today, right where you are”. And he was good at that. But how…

How do we relate that positive philosophy to our living with changing priorities and losing sight of our personal direction and purpose in life? It seems to me that many of our major life events make and mold how we see ourselves, how we value ourselves. No doubt that we have each enjoyed many happy moments and periods of time in our life where we were happy and living the fun and fulfilling dream that you envisioned for yourself and possibly your family. But those painful times, they find every one of us. Whether it’s illness or tragedy, the loss of a loved one, financial ruin, or divorce; the list is long and depressing. It’s hard to plan for fun or experience happy adventures when all your life’s valuables are seemingly falling in ruin at your feet.

 I believe that it's during these times that most of us allow the internal drive and purpose of our lives to become altered. Where the vision for our happiness becomes skewed or blurred, or maybe even completely blocked out by the hurt of an illness or the depression of a sudden loss. It’s during these times that the second part of what my dad used to say to me comes into play. He would ask, “what are you doing that for?” In other words, is this your passion or someone else’s? I will take that question one step further here in our thoughts together and ask, ‘who... are you doing that for?’ ‘Who do you wrap your life’s purpose around?’ The answer to that might shed some light on the reason behind our sudden and sometimes debilitating internal struggles with our life’s purpose and the fears of failure and loneliness. What or who is at the focus of your life? And when these hard times come to us, and truly they will come to us all eventually, then what is the foundational center of your life? Certainly, don’t spend all your time looking too far ahead to see your path change, and don’t fall into the trap of constantly looking back into your past. It takes a lot of effort to focus on today, regardless of our feelings, and see the good in a bad day, a bad month or year.

You see, how you live on the outside, depends largely on how you live on the inside. And your belief that you are a valuable asset to God’s plan during and after your trials, will hinge on whether you live with Him at your center to start with. You and I may not always know our purpose in this life to the exact measure He intends to use it, and our direction will certainly alter course over the years. Remember that most things of value require refinement of some type. In John 12: 24-25 the message of the Bible goes something like this. Until a seed of grain is buried out of sight and lifeless to this world, it cannot grow, it’s just a seed. In fact, it is only after the seed is left underground and experiences the trial of darkness that the miracle of change begins. Eventually growing into a plant fully capable of producing new seeds for many new plants to grow. It continues the lesson with these words to us. Like a seed, if we hold on to our lives so tightly as to prevent change, you will die. The seed will eventually become inert. But if you let go of your fear, and love God with careless abandon, then you will know real love, real grace, and fulfilling purpose, forever.

We are the seeds of God’s kingdom, and yes, we go through all sorts of trials that test our resolve and faith in Him, and each other. This lesson was taught by Jesus just days before His crucifixion. His reminder that through our struggles and heartache, we become more and more valuable to His work here amongst our families and friends. It is the center of our life, the question that I asked you earlier, ‘who… do you do life for’? Though we all fail, if you will put God at the center of your life, your foundation will not move. Your purpose will be steady and fulfilling through all your trials. Today this message is mine as well as yours, I struggle. I hope that together we can remember that struggle is part of sprouting into something new. It’s part of growing and reproducing, but what are we reproducing? Is it worthy of your life’s work? An example being passed down from us to the next seed? Think about that, because your life will leave a legacy somewhere, in someone.

Some of you may not yet have taken that step to trust in a God that you can’t see or touch. After all, the rest of the world tells you that He does not exist, that it’s all just legends and stories told to make us feel better and safe. I won’t debate you on the reality or proof of God, I’ll only tell you that I believe. I felt it inside myself many years ago, as I believe you do too, I knew that I needed Him. It isn’t complicated to stop and tell Him that you want Him in your life. Just talk, God will listen. And though I am not worthy to be His messenger, I pray my legacy and offspring are many who continue to look to God, even in times of darkness. When the light is not seen, and when we feel as though the world has left us for dead and considers us useless; when our priorities and personal direction is in turmoil, I pray that you and I will seek the center of our lives in the presence of a loving Father, whose number one ambition is to show us love and grace. That should be our focus and our gift to those who come after us - today, and forever.

John 12: 24-25

ShoeBox Thoughts - The Book, it's here

     As many of you know, I have been working on a book that would bring these messages into physical form and today I have finally accomplished that task. Over the past two years I have put together past published works, and some new pieces just to keep it fresh, into a devotional book called, "ShoeBox Thoughts, Messages from the ShoeBox Prophet". I know, it's a surprise title choice isn't it? But my purpose has always been to share these thoughts and life lessons with as many people as I could, so this book is an extension of this blog ministry, perhaps going where the internet cannot, or just giving someone a chance at real world, hands-on time for some basic heart and  mind thinking.

    The past two years were not without hardship in our house; losing my mother, both parents are now with the Lord, and my wife being diagnosed with one of the worst forms of breast cancer, I can say without a doubt, that going through these messages and editing often reminded me the author, that I continue to need them, and to be reminded that I need God's grace and mercy every day. In fact, my wife Michelle says on occasion, you need to go back and re-read what you wrote about how your acting. Just confirming that I will never be more than one beggar, showing other beggars, where to find food and shelter in Christ.

     It is my earnest prayer that after reading these messages, and listening to God's whisper in your ear, that you will share them with those who are hurting and lonely, without the hope that we cling to through the Good News. They need us to show them that "all have fallen short", and we walk together. This book is just another tool to allow us to share the message of love and grace that keeps us afloat and alive in a life of continuing storms.

UPDATE 12/5/2017:

     Use the link below to check out my sales page for ShoeBox Thoughts, both versions are now on one page for your convenience. It is for sale on Amazon, and various outlets around the world.

Use this link to visit Amazon to buy your copy today

Click here to go to my Amazon sales page for Paperback & Kindle

     Also, you can follow the link below to my authors page on Amazon. It will give some additional background from time to time, and also gives others links back to this blog. 

Use this link to see my author page and follow my books

    More than anything, I want to say thank you to everyone here that has commented and left me notes or sent email. I am doing life every day just like you are, and the encouragement and friendship mean a lot to me. I hope to return to writing more blog pieces now that the editing for this project is complete, it has been a great experience but an exhausting one creatively. Now, back to writing.

God’s mercy and blessing be with you all.

Randy

Gloriously Gifted

I could use countless illustrations to compare ordinary people to each other. Colors of hair, skin, or even clothes are all differences that set us apart. However, our similarities far outweigh those differences, bodies of one over-all race, human. For now, I want to compare the makeup of the church body to our human bodies. If you aren't even sure about all of this talk of Jesus, and "being saved", lend me your ear for just a few more moments, what I am about to say isn't just for the churchy people. It's about our importance and self-worth in a world that takes no prisoners when it comes to low self esteem or braggadocios, better-than-thou behavior. Both extremes are dangerous, depressing, and far from your real purpose in life.
Equality and tolerance, we hear these words a lot these days, and more often than not, in a description of how someone is not acting, rather than how they are. Why is it that we, as a race of somewhat intellectually developed beings, can't treat each other with consistent mercy and grace, while respecting our differences? Prepare yourself for a sophisticated and highly controversial proverb, because no one is perfect! I know, disappointing isn't it? The worlds problems cannot really be that simple can they?
When you mix together millions of imperfect people from varying backgrounds, stir in a few different religions, and then separate them in geographic areas that create very opposing societies, you end up with power struggles, greed, enslavement, poverty, class warfare, property disputes. This list is as long as it's peoples heritage. The people of earth are, at their core, very flawed. We want what others have, take what is not ours, devalue our own worth, and shame others for things in their lives more public than our own.
Whether you are a mature Christian and life-long church-going Pharisee supreme, or just a struggling failed human of the doubting and fearful nature like most of us, let me illustrate how we overcome these ingrained tendencies, and why we need each other so much. If you take a look at your own body, a quick inventory will confirm that most of us are born with legs, arms, eyes, ears, a heart, lungs, liver and so on. If you are a great musician, then maybe your hands are very gifted at the keys of a piano, or the bow of a beautiful violin. Perhaps you're a fabulous track star or a football standout, and your legs are your winning quality. As a producer and sound engineer, my ears, and the knowledge of what I am hearing and how to manipulate sounds, makes my ears valuable to a great sound production.
Now lets take those thoughts and put them into this perspective, are any of those parts more important than the others? I'm sure that in dangerous situations, we would protect our gifted parts, appendages and organs; if you lost an arm, you could still live, but if you lost your liver you would need a replacement to be sure. The loss of a leg or a foot is devastating, but we can learn to live without it. If you lose your stomach or your lungs, your not going to survive without major intervention and replacements. What I am trying to point out here is this, all of these things are part of your body. Some look very important from the outside. Hands that make beautiful music, eyes that see the perfect colors of a landscape. But without the whole body, without your liver, heart, lungs and all of the other vital organs that work to keep you alive in quiet unison with the rest of your body, you not only could not function, you would be dead.
This is exactly how it is in the world of people. Some of us are called to be feet. In other words we go out into the world to do our work, which is sometimes our mission. Some of us are a mouth, we speak or teach about our passion. There are hands and arms to make music and learn skills, to do the things that need a personal and integrated touch. But then there are the people that are the heart; they supply the fire and passion to go and to build. The lungs, people that help us breath in the beauty all around us, that keep us human by taking the time to extract the oxygen of life into our system. All of us have a combined and purposeful life that is integrated with the lives of those around us. Knowing this, it is really ridiculous to think about how some people act, thinking of themselves as superior to those around them in some way, whether it's race, gender, or brains. Can a foot see the beauty of a sunset? Wouldn't the eyes do that job better? And a hand cannot convert your food into energy as your stomach and systems do.
Unfortunately, most of the world doesn't think that they need anyone beside themselves. The selfish nature of imperfect people is a hard habit to break. But even more disappointing is that our churches have invited in a model of judgement, one that says this kind of person is more valuable as a member than that kind of person. Or they elevate the gift of one person as more "mature in God" than another. I don't intend to argue which gifts are more valuable than others with you, besides, the non-Christians might still be reading along. All of us should look again at 1st Corinthians 12, and then ask ourselves if we still need to argue about this question at all. In this chapter, we find the author explaining where  gifts come from and who is behind the decision to give what to whom. Verse 4 explains that His varying gifts are handed out all over, but they all originate from God's spirit. God's ministries and displays of power are in obvious action around us every day, but God Himself is behind every single one. Each of us is given a tool or something to do, that shows others who God is. All of us, in amazing variety, is handed something by the spirit of God, to some it's wise counsel or clarity to understand life's issues. To others he hands the ability to heal the sick, or perform miracles, or perhaps just be a good listener, and a trusting ear. Still there are those who are gifted to proclaim God's messages, call out spirits, speak in tongues, and those that interpret those things as well. All of these are from God, but are gifted to us individually, by His will, so that we can use them to gloriously bring praise and acknowledgement to Him. If that is a little too religious sounding for you. it means that God grants us these individual gifts not to make us look good, but to serve others. Serve. The idea isn't to categorize them and decide which ones are better than others. No. It's pretty simple if you will check your ego at the door.
The gift God grants to you isn't about you. It's about making you something more than you were before you asked Him to help you grow, and change into a person more like Him. As ragamuffins, we have nothing that He could want when it comes to talents or things. What He wants is your willingness. Willingness to show others grace and love. Willingness to share your gift of leadership or healing. He wants to set you apart from who you were without Him.
Certainly I write to you not as a scholar or a PhD, not even a preaching pastor with a sizable church to prove my important status. But I write to us both, because God has called me to do it, and the gift that He has handed out to me asks me to bring others the healing and merciful good news that He knows our imperfections. He knows that you aren't always right, and that you have made some really dumb decisions in your life. You know what, so has everyone else. The hand and the foot have been wrong, just like the lungs, eyes and mouth. Our existence here starts out as one of failure and defeat, but as beggars often do, we have found a safe place to eat and to sleep. A place that gives us rest, and helps us to find footing again.
God knows and expects us to all be different. What a shame when we put others down for not meeting our expectations. He calls us to love every ragamuffin in His creation. Their choices and lifestyles may be different, and honestly, might even be offensive to us in some ways, but real judgement is the Lord's. I don't remember ever reading about God handing out the gift of judgement. But love, grace, forgiveness, respect, and mercy, those actions could change the world around us in profound ways. Every day, in our walk through this life, God asks from us, whom He calls His children, to display that which He has richly blessed us with. Each of us, are His gloriously gifted.

1st Corinthians 12  (Msg)

Would You Believe..

Luke 1: 5-25 - Zachariah, God's plan in spite of our disbelief.

  As we grow through our teenage years, and into young adulthood, there are many questions that we ask ourselves, how to find a job, who our real friends are, what comes after high school or college? All of these mysteries and thousands more, they flood our minds with possibilities and fear, with the insecurity of a future yet to be written. Our purpose growing through this is to be mindful of our path and consider what we have been taught; using what we have learned from our life lessons and mentors to make decisions that will be good ones and benefit our lives, instead of creating consequences from making the wrong choices.
  Certainly that is a positive goal, to make all the right choices, and follow God's perfect path for our life, but what do you do when that isn't the case? If you're worried that no one has made the kind of mistakes that you have made, relax. Everyone has failed. You are a member of a very public and widely inclusive group. Most of our life, we make decisions based of what we know to be true, or what we have been taught, but have you ever questioned what you believe? Or why you believe it? I think we all have gone through that stage to some degree. I never questioned the existence of God, but I most certainly questioned how I believed in Him. What he wanted from me, and how would I know if I was hearing Him, or just doing what I wanted and calling it God's will. I know that I wondered why there were so many different types of churches, and why some grew larger than others and seemed to reach successfully into their communities, and others stayed the same, decade after decade. As life continues it's wandering journey, our questions will evolve, some get answered with causes for joy and sorrow alike; careers, spouses, children, death. None of us know all of the answers, so the best advice is to know someone who does. Now if it was just easier to figure out how to understand His responses.
          If you think that God can't work through you because you lack faith, or connection as a Christian, let me tell you about a man named Zachariah. By all accounts, Zachariah was a Godly man. He did have a flaw though that a lot of us can identify with, he had prayed to God for a lifetime to give him a son. Year after year, it didn't happen. Have you wondered like I have, "God, why don't you hear me", "why don't you answer me the way I want you too"? Zachariah had grown old, waiting on God to answer his prayers, maybe even a little resentful, apparently the answer was no. In Luke 1, the story of an unbelieving Zachariah is told, not to embarrass, but perhaps to give us hope, and an example of God's grace. Though Elizabeth and Zachariah were an honorable couple, in good standings in the church, and apparently with God, Elizabeth could not conceive. At the time, without medical explanations to bring reason to this sad situation, I am sure many around them scorned and made fun of them. They may have even been accused of having some hidden sin in there lives, something that caused God to "punish" them by keeping them from having a son. Just to be clear, God doesn't want to punish us for sinning, His desire was and is to forgive us. When the angel finally came to Zachariah and he told him that Elizabeth would conceive, old Zach just couldn't believe it. I get the feeling that Gabriel, God's honored sentinel solder, was a little frustrated with Zachariah's disbelief, so much so that he asked Zachariah if he knew who he was talking to.
          To make a believer out of Zachariah, Gabriel told him that he would not speak again until the baby was born. I'm not sure which would be worse, the fact that suddenly you have no ability to speak, or that even as an official of the church, you lacked enough faith in God to believe an angelic announcement of your blessing. Imagine telling your family, friends and church the real reason why you are compelled to silence, but it's a rather good lesson for us. Zachariah's doubts, and unbelief didn't stop God's plan from being fulfilled. John was born into the world just the same, as the bearer of the good news to come.
          Has God called you to pray for someone at school or work? Maybe you feel the tug on your heart to teach a small group in your home. Would you believe, a calling to write a book about your ragamuffin walk with Jesus? (I wouldn't). Rarely are we called in an obvious manor, with great signs and wonders appearing in the sky, or being handed to us packaged neatly and concise, with directions and a manual for how to proceed. Usually its more like Zachariah, we doubt ourselves and we can't imagine God being serious about what He is suggesting to us. Doesn't He know that we are not qualified, not capable or equipped to do what He is asking of us? I'm sure as you read this, you recognize those questions, and you also realize how ridiculous they are, being asked of the One who hung the stars into place. The God who made a bush to burn, but not be consumed. The Father who sent His son to live with us, walk with us, teach us how to be more like Him, and then ultimately die for us. He knows our short-comings and inabilities. Yet He has a plan to use us for His purposes and take our experiences and make them tools for good in the realm of God.
          The day that John was born, just as the angel had said, Zachariah opened his mouth and spoke again. What has God placed in your life that requires faith and a first step to continue or succeed? As we learn from the story, believing is not always easy. We have rules of this world that we try to place on God, forgetting that He is the author of all things supernatural. Remember that whether or not you go along, you may end up right in the middle of it anyway, God has a way of convincing us that He's right. The question for you is very basic, can you set aside your doubts and fear of inadequacy? Maybe we can trust Him, at least long enough, for Him to show us why He has put us where we are. You may be the Bible study or youth leader, the one person to reach out to your unlovable neighbor, the coach of a child who needs a Godly mentor, the friend that takes the opportunity when it comes, to pray and talk to someone in need, or the writer whose not really a writer, but a simple beggar showing other beggars where to find bread.
          For most of my life, I have struggled with not knowing exactly what God's plan is for my future. In fact, truthfully I have been my own Zachariah many times over. Not that I've stopped talking for months because of it, but God had to break me from thinking or doing what I thought was right in my life, in order for me to ever consider His plan. There is a call that goes out to each of us. It's specific to what God wants for you and from you. Though you may be like me, and wonder what God could make of your ragged and worn life, He has a plan. And He has placed you in life, where you have just the right knowledge and experience to succeed, if He is in it. But first, 'would you believe?'

Luke 1 (msg)

Peace

  The dictionary says this about peace, that it's the state of tranquility or quiet; a place of security and freedom from oppressive thought; being in harmony and without the aggression of war, or disagreement. Take a journey with me and imagine yourself on a wooded pathway, the trees filter the sunlight through to the ground, and a wisp of mist floats above the ground cover, with its multicolored flowers sprouting from vines and bushes, so beautifully placed that it appears that a gardener had planted them there just for the ones on the path to enjoy.
     Standing alone and quiet, you close your eyes to hear the sounds of nature all around you. The chorus of birds chirping on the branches above you, the slow and gently warming breeze flowing around your body, and through the grasses and ferns on the forest floor. The faint sound of a small distant waterfall as it flows gracefully to the stream winding through these woods. You walk slowly along the dirt path, running your hands over the branches of the tiny trees as they learn to grow skyward and join their family of giants. Just for one moment, there is no rush from work, no bill to pay, no sick child to tend. No telemarketer on your phone, or leaking faucet in your house dripping to remind you that your list of honey do's is growing by the day. Only the sounds of the birds, the wind, and your footsteps break the silence. There are only you and the sights, smells, and sounds of peace.
  I wish this kind of place and peace were that easy to find whenever we needed it. In fact, the older I get, the more that I find that I need it, and seemingly the harder it is to be found. If your life lacks peace and tranquility, then we are in the same boat. Maybe we have missed the opportunities that God provides to us for finding our daily retreat, by lacking the vision to see it when it comes along. If we are so focused on success that we miss our children's laughter or musical number that they perform for us, perhaps we miss Gods invitation to enjoy the flowers of peace. Have you ever made plans to sit and enjoy a cup of coffee with a book, or the paper? How often do these plans work out? In our desperation and desolate hour, we call out to God for deliverance, but have we regularly called out to Him in real praise? Our busy lives and the temptation to have success at any cost will most certainly derail any opportunity God puts in front of us to enjoy the flight of the birds through the treetops, or feel the warmth of the afternoon breeze through our wooded meadow. I find myself guilty of these distractions as any of you. Not that I've given it all for success in business, actually I gave up my personal business to spend more time with my family years ago. But I allowed other things to slowly work their way into powerful positions in my life's schedule. Some of these were church and ministry-related, so I told myself that God called me to do it, therefore, the sacrifice was divine. Be very careful with that line in your life. God can and does call us to sacrifice for His work, but rarely have I seen that sacrifice come through the cost of our families, and friends worth. I say to us all, guard against being too busy or "called". Serve your family first, for if you lose that battlefront to the enemy, what will the rest of your life's work mean when you're called home.

If you need peace as a regular part of your life as I do,then you must first learn to seek it, accept it and finally enjoy it.

     It hasn't been that easy for me to find and I bet the same can be said for you in your life. when we need it the most, we are often too far from it to see it. This is where the seeking part comes in. In John 14: 25 - 27 Jesus is trying to explain that He is leaving the apostles. That the plan of His destiny had already been set into motion, and that He should follow the Father's will right down to the very last detail. From Palm Sunday right through the rest of the week, He was following the plan of God. So obedience and a faithful heart are at the core of serving God, but peace, how do we seek peace? That same passage goes on to quote Jesus saying, "This friend of mine, the Holy Spirit who will be sent by my Father because I have asked Him too, will make your eyes to see all of the things that I have talked to you about, remind you of every word, every council, and every story. I am leaving you in the very best of hands, complete and connected as whole children of a loving and grace-filled God. That is my going away gift to you, Peace. I don't go away leaving you the way that I found you, alone, abandoned and void of the knowledge of my love"
  It seems that before you were even born, a map was drawn with the words and directions from Jesus and given directly to us, on how to find that peace that we each long for so desperately. I believe that it doesn't come through success or owning a lot of nice things, we cannot create our own peace. He said that His friend, the Comforter, was coming to remind us of the things that He taught. Lessons like Love is kind, it never demands it's own way. To treat others as we would want to be treated. That grace was abundant and free for every one of us. That those who prayed out loud just to be heard by others would find no reward in His kingdom. That the only way to the Father was through Him; He is the way, the truth, and the light.
  How often do we go through life forgetting the amazing truth of those lessons? God loves us in spite of who we are; He loves us because of whose we are. If you long for the quiet of the forested meadow, with the tall trees and the smell of the flowers and pines filling the air, and the sounds of all nature at your ears, then you long for the worship of our King. For in our silence, the rocks and the hills cry out to affirm that He is Lord. Maybe that is why we find such solace in that setting. Deep within ourselves, we know that they are singing our song, praising our Father. Seek out your way to praise Him in private. Find a way to move your branches and chirp your song, but do it in a way that it is between you and God alone. Start slowly and without a big production, remember this is your meadow song before your Father. Your peace is there, in that place. Don't be too busy to try, it might only be a few minutes each day, or you might decide to make more time for it, whatever the case, seek Him, praise Him, alone. In that quiet space, you will find rest, you will find comfort, and peace will find you.

The basis for biblical quote from John 14: 25-27 (MSG)

Who Will Go

     Recently, a mentor of mine reminded me that it is not always the perfect and skillfully educated people that do the leading and discovering. More often than not, it’s the willing and even more importantly, the available, that fill those shoes. Those who talk without polish in their words, or lead without knowing the odds. Stepping out into a leadership role can be scary, and if it doesn’t scare you, you probably aren’t a good one. There were many reluctant leaders in the Bible. Moses and Jonah found out that even if you fight against God’s will, He sometimes has already laid the groundwork to use you, and no matter how hard you fight, God will find a way to put you where He wants you.
      Let’s just look at Jonah for a minute, Jonah was not ungodly. He knew God, and I think he probably thought of himself as a good person. Certainly God thought that he had something usable to reach the people of Nineveh. But for several reasons, Jonah was scared. He ran the complete and opposite direction from where God wanted him to be. Boarding a ship to sail away into the sunset, God put into motion a set of circumstances that would eventually find Jonah thrown overboard by the captain and crew. A bit extreme if you stop to think about it; yet no sooner than they had disposed of Jonah, the sea became more calm, and they were saved. They obviously made the right choice.
     Jonah on the other hand, had started out with some very bad decisions. I have a question for you though, after telling the crew of the boat the truth and coming clean about what he had done, did his life get better? I would say spending days alive, inside of a fish qualify as things only got worse for him. After some time, Jonah arrive where God had intended, and with an even more fascinating story with which to reach and hold the attention of the people of Nineveh. I’m sure he looked the part as well, haggled, worn, and in general a real mess.
      It seems that this story could be told about each one of us doesn't it? Of course you may never be thrown overboard from a ship, or swallowed by a fish, but don’t you feel like you have been on some days. I sure do. It doesn’t even necessarily come from directly going against God’s call, sometimes it’s just our stubborn resistance to follow His direction in our lives. We want something so bad, that we do it even knowing God wouldn’t approve. I’ve made decisions that way, and I am sure that you have too. Some are of lesser consequence, and then there some that really get us thrown overboard.
     The mindset that I usually find myself in when I feel God’s leading is this; I’m not qualified to do what I feel God is calling me toward. Either because I resisted so long to do it, or because I feel like I lack the education, experience or the skill to do it. I talk myself out of even considering it. I board my ship, and sail as fast as I can in the other direction. Not that I am, or ever have been, called to preach and save an entire region as Jonah was, but you have to understand that God isn’t always looking for that. He calls each of us to serve and believe it or not, most times the people and places He is calling us to are right where we are. Family, neighbors, friends, co-workers. Not everyone is an overseas missionary, in fact those are the rarest of people He calls.
     I am sure that you are thinking of someone or something that God has nudged you about in the past, or may be currently filling your heart with thoughts of, “this is for you”. Mine have changed over the years. Yours may too. I didn’t feel all that qualified for most of them either, but each time that I have been spit out by the fish that rescued me from running away from God’s plan, wonderful things have happened. I’ve met new people, some are affected by the stories or music that I have to share. It never ceases to amaze me how God uses my regular life of trial and error, and non-super powers effort, to create an outcome of beauty that glorifies Him. That’s His grace in my life; not only has He forgiven me, but He allows me to help others through sharing my journey and life lessons with others that are going through similar times. This is the true intention for fellowship.
     I’m not going to tell you that it isn’t a little scary at times. Okay, sometimes a lot scary. I think, “what if I am a complete failure”. If you feel that way too, remember this, you are following a path that God has led you to. If you have been obedient and prayed about it, asked mentors what they think, prayed some more, and you all agree that you should go forward with it, then you’re doing the right thing. Just remember, sometimes success can be in disguise. God’s plans can be far down the road, and though you and I may see what we did as a flop, it may be a foundation for what someone else comes to finish. Don’t judge your results by yourself; let God do that. Then listen to family and have good accountable mentors that can help you gauge if you are really being effective.. Don’t be afraid to say, I have finished this calling, or God has given me a new plan of action, and it’s time to move on. If I had not done that, you would never have read this message.
     The answer to who will go is simple, those that are willing to try. It’s not a pastor's job to reach everyone with God’s message. They can’t go to your work or school, and they certainly don't have your life stories of forgiveness and mercy to share and use to relate to others; You and I are called to go. We must, especially if you know God is calling you to a specific place or group of people. The alternative of sailing away in defiance in your own direction, well, we all know how that ended up for Jonah. Unless you are feeling short of trials and failures in your own life to share, I suggest we try His way the first time for once. Maybe you’ve done it your way for a while now, and you are not sure how to change. That is the single biggest obstacle for me to be sure, change. We can all do it differently as we take a step out in faith to follow our path. Believe in what God is calling you to do, seek His guidance. It isn’t easy, but it’s never too late to change. Finding your way to tell others about how your journey led to a "boat ride" of running away, or being swallowed by a big fish called failure; being used by God to help someone else in need, through our scars, that my friend is what grace is all about.

Jonah 1, 2, & 3
(also inspired by the passion and ministry of Pastor Terry Schneider

The Thief

When Christ was on the cross, there were two men on either side of Him, one accepted Him, knowing that he himself was a sinner and that he needed to ask for forgiveness. The other was a hardened criminal, with an even harder heart. He didn't show remorse for his deeds, and he certainly seemed to make it clear that he didn’t need Jesus to "save" him. He rejected his last opportunity to make his life right before a forgiving God.

If you think about it, these two men represent a lot of us, on either side of the struggle between good and evil. One side seeks forgiveness and a change within ourselves and our motives; the other side is self-serving, mocking all that is good and seeking only the pleasures of life without the responsibilities.

I can imagine these two men might have started out life much the same. Two little boys with dreams of becoming someone great when they grew up. But somewhere along the way, one learned about respect, and honor before your family. The value of good actions and outcomes. The other little boy learned that if he wanted something bad enough, he could just take it. He needed to be tough. He would steal or cheat his way to what he wanted regardless of it being deserved or earned. No one else's feelings or needs outweighed his own. Although they both ended up on a cross as scorned and convicted thieves, there was a difference in their final hours. I believe somewhere in the one man's life, he was blessed with a caring person, maybe a mom or a dad, or a sibling that continued to tell him about the good that they saw in him. That he could be more than he was allowing himself to be. I am sure that by the time Jesus saw him on that cross next to Him, this man was remembering all of the times that someone had told him, “You are more than a thief, more than a bad, uncaring person”. And Jesus saw it too.

If we can open up our own hearts and minds for a minute, and truthfully analyze our own motives, which of the thieves would we be? It’s a sure thing that we are all selfish in our own way. That we all deserve punishment for being disobedient servants. Yes, we represent both of the thieves that died that day. We are the rebels, the ones that don’t want to admit that we are wrong. The failed mothers and fathers. We are the children that have made poor choices and ended up with consequences that we never believed would be ours to bear. The ones that say, “God cannot love me now, I am the one that nailed Him there.” “I deserve everything I get”. And we’d be correct to say that. On our own, without the forgiving grace of Jesus, we don’t deserve saving, and we certainly don’t deserve a heavenly promise of beautiful streets of gold and everlasting happiness.

I am so thankful that the second thief took his last minutes here on this earth to allow God to teach us a lesson through his words from the cross. In his last moments, he was willing to be used as a teaching vessel for thousands who came after him, including you and me. This thief looked at Jesus and said, remember me when you get to your kingdom.

A Calling Lost

     While going through some old notebooks in my studio, I came across this missive. It was written almost ten years ago, when I was struggling with the loss of my father, and the loss of a ministry lifestyle that was very bold and somewhat notorious in the community. I thought that God had finally planted me where my vision of using my gifts was going to be up to my expectations. Notice all of the "my" in that last sentence? While we did have a dynamic time of local ministry, and were used to accomplish some great and fun things, God had plans for us to grow and be used in other ways; plans that were not stagnant, and certainly not on our radar. In the years since that time, my friends and I have suffered tragedy, sickness, and change beyond our comprehension. The good news is this, through all of the hurt and struggle, God has been shaping us to His form. There have been great and wondrous times where I have grown to do things that I never considered possible. My calling swerved from sound engineer/producer and background singer, to worship leader then from worship leader to writer, speaker and author.

  What I want you to see by sharing my thoughts from years ago is this; you are made by God with a purpose. He has a plan to use you to affect the lives of others, but be aware of this, the needs of the kingdom of God change with the flow of time. The opportunity to serve God is never dull or monotonous, your calling is a journey through life's maze. It's something that needs shaping and experience, that's where life's trials and triumphs come in. Don't loose your direction, look for ways to renew it, change it, shape it into something that gives you meaning and relevance towards sharing God's love and grace. Callings aren't lost, they are abandoned. Don't walk away from yours, I promise that God has a purpose and a plan to use your life, every good and bad thing in it, to change a life of someone in need. The following was a time of just such transition for me...

  I was thinking lately that even people that we consider 'big time' in the ministry can lose their way, or worse decide it's just not for them anymore. It surprised me to read that the lead singer of a 1980's Christian rock super-group is now selling real estate. Once thought of as a premier voice in the industry, he isn't really singing or performing much at all these days. It's not that he had vocal issues, or the band ran out of material, he said that he just grew tired of the grind that touring had become. A close friend of mine, whom I consider to be one of the best public speakers and Christian teachers alive today, shared with me that he isn't really preaching at all anymore. He has other duties in his new church, administrative and financial responsibilities that govern the church, and really leave little time to think about sermons and sharing publicly. There is also our band, Last Second Chance. We have spent countless hours together writing, producing and recording music to share the gospel; we haven't sang together in months, and have no plans to play, write or lead worship together in the near future. What happens to us that makes us forget the importance of our calling? Certainly there was a lot of fire burning within us at one time. Is it burned out? Did we push so hard to get going that now we are too weak to sustain our passion? Or does the passion that we have, over time and spent energy,  just diminished on its own? A sort of natural leveling out of enthusiasm. Whatever the reason, the outcome seems the same, we retire ourselves from God's mission in our lives. Is that in His plan? Is He simply just done with us? This can hardly be the case! In many phases of life things change, priorities change, our needs wants and desires change. Sometimes our abilities change, but should this be a sign of dismissal to us? Positively not.. It should trigger us to think, "How can I change or adapt myself to stay relevant and effective". I hear those words and wonder why I cannot apply what I just wrote to my own life. Maybe it's all just about timing, God's timing not ours. Maybe, it's about ego, ours not His. Perhaps our biggest fault in ministry is thinking to ourselves "look what a great job I'm doing". Thinking that our plan is better than waiting on God's is never a good idea.

  Lets get back to basics for a thought or two, shall we. We all have gifts, you may know for certain what yours are. Some of of you may still be searching. Others of us search for fresh and new gifts and callings as we feel the old ones become less effective or needed. But the fact is, God has always known what your gifts were. He put them there after all and His intent is for us to let Him use them through us. So does it sound like something he would have us do for a short time and then quit or retire? Doesn't it seem a bit unreasonable that God would prepare, protect, and then deliver us into His time and place of meeting people where they have a need, only to have us throw in the towel after we get tired or worn? Could the purpose of God's plan, planting us into a special opportunity to share an experience through words or song, be that we are especially forgiven through grace, to be a credible witness for what He has done in our own life? All of my past and yours made you and I uniquely qualified to use the special talents that he has given to us in order to reach the hurting and make a difference in the lives of others. There is no retirement from giving yourself fully to Christ; there is however a renewal and seeking in Him, a path that keeps us vigorous and effective. Our calling allows us to joyfully and tirelessly share the good news of Jesus. Change is one of the few consistent things about living. It is certain to happen. How we respond to change will set the bar for our usefulness as a tool for God. How are you responding to the 'change' in your life. Are you finding more ways to share Jesus with the gifts that you have? Or are you more like me, you're wondering why God has put you on hold? After a little thought.. Has God really put us on hold? Or did we hang up on him... I think now would be a good time to pray and call Him back..